“It should have been with you!”

Have you ever heard someone say that their spouse and\or children “should have been with you (or someone else)?” I heard it recently. I was a little shocked. Well maybe more than a little shocked, more like dumbfounded for a split second.

I do this thing where I say everything that’s on my mind with just my facial expressions. Many of my friends say I wear my heart on my sleeve. It’s one of my denial traits but it’s true, I won’t deny it today – I wear my heart on my sleeve every so often. It is though, something that I consistently work on. The last thing I want to show is an expression of stupidness either inwardly or outwardly.

I thought to myself- this guy is over 40 years old, he can not be serious. We were face to face and my immediate reaction without a doubt spewed from out my body and through my facial expressions. I felt it come over me entirely, there was no denying it.

I have learned a lot in my 39 years. I know that everyone has the same rights with their lives as the next person. We are all here with our own choices and making our own decisions. Some great, some not so great and some who really cares. I believe many of us lack personal responsibility. We lack accepting that we have paved our lives. We are where we are at today because of the decisions we have made.

I know for many it’s hard to go after what we want. Either we don’t believe in ourselves, we don’t believe it’s possible or sadly we just do not have the will. I breathe it and live it. I try to be that person that when I want something, for the most part, I go get it. If it’s attainable I’m all in and I am certainly up for a challenge. I still fall short though, and many times my attempts don’t follow through. We can’t let our short comings stop us. Yes it is discouraging but we are only getting older and tomorrow isn’t promised. We want to make sure we lived our days here to the very fullest with what we have or what we can create.

We each have a choice in who we pick as our partners and parents of our children. If we can’t be accepting to our own decisions and be personally responsible for the outcome of our choices then we are holding ourselves back from a better life. A free life. Holding on to the past is imprisoning. We have right now. We have what we create. If it’s not satisfying and we desire change, there’s only one way that’s going to happen. Start with you!

In closing………. If it “should have been” you (or me,) trust me – it would have. Stop sharing that same old story.

Make 2017 phenomenal!

1 Comment on “It should have been with you!”

  1. I tell my children to chose the fathers of their children wisely. A good man. And they totally comprehend what I mean by this. I could go on. But will say just this, some relationships fail. And although it was intense and you had deep love and admiration for one another, sometimes when you understand fully the needs of the other person you can’t fully provide, you move on. But that love doesn’t go away. Rather, it’s a different kind of love. I would never say I wish it was someone else. In spite of it all, I love sharing parenthood with the father of my children. I am beyond thankful that I have a supportive partner to parent alongside in this life. I’m a better mom because of him and vice versa.

    Side note, liked how you shut that comment down though, “ifnit should have been me, trust me, it would have.” Lol

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